In June 2014 I was so nervous about becoming a new mom. I asked the doctor lots of questions, I read books, and I took classes. I thought all those things would teach me everything I needed to know about motherhood. Sadly, I was mistaken. I was taught how to change diapers, swaddle, and breastfeed, but nothing past the newborn stage. In this post I will share the 10 Things I wish I knew as a new mom.
How to Prepare Yourself as A First Time Mom
Becoming a mother usually starts with lots of questions; either to women around us that we are close to, or our family doctor. For most women, preparing for motherhood starts with taking care of yourself first.
You can start by exercising daily, taking daily vitamins, and eating healthier choice foods. Your baby’s health starts with you and will continue on for the next 9 months.
Next I would start by asking family and friends, who have smaller children, if you could be of any assistance to them. Baby sitting is one of the best ways to prepare yourself as a first-time mom.
What better way to learn than to experience mothering first hand. Familiarize yourself with things like how to change diapers, learning how to test the temperature of warm bottles, or how to burp the baby; and whatever else beyond the new born stage of motherhood.
Mothering can sometimes feel like your being thrown into a sea of uncertainty; but as you go you will grow.
Its also important to have a financial plan when growing a family. Now I wouldn’t say you need thousands of dollars to start growing a family, but you do need to have a savings plan in place.
Start by creating a baby expense fund; and saving 10% of every pay check. Although, you will most likely start out with gifts from the baby shower, baby expenses like diapers, wipes, formula, and clothing are constantly changing and expanding in every stage of mothering.
The Hardest Part of Being a New Mom
One of the biggest challenges of being a new mom is learning to care for yourself while taking care of the demanding needs of a newborn baby.
Newborn babies need to be feed, changed, and soothed round the clock, and at all times of night. The best advice I could ever receive was to” take care of yourself and then care for the baby”.
Now in no way shape or form does this mean to neglect your baby, its simply means to learn to care for yourself and make your needs just as important as the needs of the baby.
In the early stages of mothering, it is so easy to miss showers, and neglect self-care.
Place your baby in the arms of a spouse, care giver, or a safe place like a crib or bassinet, and take a moment to maybe brush your hair, brush your teeth, and take a quick shower.
You would be amazed at how much a simple shower can impact your entire day.
You got this mama!
Mothering can sometimes feel like your being thrown into a sea of uncertainty; but as you go you will grow.
Things I Wish I Knew As a First Time Mom
- You won’t be an expert in motherhood overnight
- Motherhood isn’t a sprint, it takes time and effort to develop a bond with your child to understand exactly what your child needs. You and Your child will be learning and growing together, give it time and ask your doctor all the questions you need answered to be more comfortable in your new role.
- A good mother isn’t measured by how many items you cross off your To-do list
- As a first time mom I spent so much time doing things that I thought would make me a great mother, crossing things off your to do list doesn’t determine your value. You don’t have to do everything none the less, do everything right or how your mother did it to be great.
- The most expensive item, may not be the best item for your child
- Do not get caught up in the latest baby item, or fancy new stroller. Social media can sometimes make you feel pressured into having expensive fancy high tech baby items. If you can afford those things, great; if you can’t get what you can and always ask for recommendations before purchase big ticket items.
- People will offer Unsolicited Advice
- Strangers, Friends, and Family will offer advice but it is your job to take what you need and dispose of the rest. Some advice will be very helpful, but others may feel like they are crossing a thin line.
- Motherhood is Not Perfect
- An important part of motherhood is learning to pivot when challenges happen.
- You Are The Mother
- If you are married, you and your spouse will make the decisions for your family. However, if you are single you will make the decisions alone. Remember you are the mother, just because your mom or grandmother did things a certain way doesn’t mean that you should do it the exact same.
- Your Body is Beautiful
- Your body has gone through a lot of changes over the last 9 months, it will not REVERT back in a day. Give yourself some grace, your body will heal in its own timing.
- Don’t Forget to Take Care of Yourself
- Learning to say No is form of self care. If you aren’t up for visitors or don’t feel like attending a family function, simply say NO!
- Never Miss The Opportunity to Spend Time with Your Spouse
- Children can be very demanding, don’t forget to spend time with your spouse
- Cherish each moment, It goes by Quickly
- We can sometimes get so caught up in caring for the baby and the needs of our home, that we forget to stop and enjoy the moments. Don’t let life pass you by.
- Start with Planning
- Get good at planning and preparation so you don’t miss any appointments or special events,.
Becoming a Mother
Motherhood is a journey not at destination. The road of motherhood has lots of twist and turns, but it is also filled with beautiful moments you’ll never experience anywhere else.
Although, you may be anxious and filled with lots of questions, I hope that what you know now, will help you toward your journey as a new mom.
Always, Takia Sharee